


shooting for gold

by emilyrambles



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: 2016 Summer Olympics, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Olympics, F/F, Football | Soccer, Princess Mechanic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-23
Updated: 2016-09-02
Packaged: 2018-08-10 11:28:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 14,888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7843129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emilyrambles/pseuds/emilyrambles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clarke Griffin is going to the Rio Olympics and she's not coming home without a gold medal hanging around her neck. The thing is, being the USWNT's star striker puts a lot of weight on her shoulders, but as long as she has Raven Reyes by her side nothing can go wrong. Right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. oh captain, my captain

**Author's Note:**

> I finally got into the mood to write again and so here is an idea I've had since the Olympics started. Hope you enjoy.

She's running. Faster than she's ever ran before. Her feet thump heavily on the tarmac of the sports track, and she's entirely focused on controlling her breathing; pushing the oxygen around her body and going that extra mile. That's what she does.

She is an Olympian after all.

Well, she will be. For the second time, in just under a month.

The past four years since the last Olympics have been a blur. It seems like only yesterday she was holding a silver medal at London 2012, gutted to have missed out on gold but thrilled to have got that far at only eighteen years of age. She was called the _Rising Star_ , the _Golden Girl_ , the surprise striker of women's soccer, destined for greatness, to match the likes of Abby Wambach or even Mia Hamm.

As soon as the 2012 Olympics were over she attracted the attention of not only the nation's media, but also the top clubs. After much deliberation, and four offers, she decided to move to what she considers to be the best women's league team in the world- the Arkers. After that, the Arkers won the National Women's Soccer League three times, and the Women's Cup. She's not saying she was the sole reason for the club's new victories, but she's the sole reason for the club's victories. With her as their leading goalscorer, their team is unstoppable.

But she's most proud of one award in particular. The golden boot. It's not as flashy as winning the league some people would say, but it's still probably her favourite award to have won. She now not only says she's the best striker in the world, she has the silverware and awards to prove it. Winning the 2015 World Cup as the tournament's leading goalscorer just reinforced that fact.

"Clarke! Hey, Clarke!" a voice snaps her out of her thoughts of standing on the podium holding a gold medal in her hands. She would be annoyed if it was anyone else interrupting her.

But this is Raven Reyes.

When she moved to join the Arkers as a young centre forward, she didn't expect anyone to welcome her or accept her so quickly. After all, she was the newbie, and the favourite of the Olympics. The dickheads she prefers to forget about only argued she was chosen to play in London because legendary coach Abby Griffin, her _dearest_ mother, became the national team's Head Coach in 2010, and the accusations of cronyism were constant in the beginning. In reality, her critics only had to look for three seconds at Clarke's abilities on the pitch to see she had earned that place. Moving from her small club in Washington, the only home she's ever known, to play in the big leagues with the Arkers in New York was the biggest decision of her life. And with Abby distracted with changing and shaping her new ideas for the national team, Clarke was alone.

Then Raven Reyes happened. And now she's found a new home.

Raven is only a year older than Clarke, but they just clicked together in a way she's never had with a teammate, or a friend, before. Clarke has never been more grateful to have someone in her life than Raven, because she knows for sure she wouldn't be going to Rio if it wasn't for her.

 

//

 

_"Clarke! Where the fuck are you Clarke?" Raven yells, trying to make her voice heard over the pouring rain. Their late night training session had finished early due to a thunderstorm cracking through the sky and making it almost impossible to see the ball, let alone the players. The Arkers coach, the ruthless but infamous Indra, had called it a night and let her players go get changed and warm inside the training complex, being cautious about training too hard and getting her players injured before the season finishes. Raven was just about to hit the showers when she had glanced around the changing room and noticed Clarke's absence immediately. She denied Octavia's request to go back for dinner with the rest of the team, making an excuse that she had errands to run. She could tell Octavia didn't believe her for a second, but let her pass by without a word as she made her way back to the pitch outside._

_Her plan was to run outside and tell Clarke to stop being an idiot for training in this stupid weather, but she'd been yelling Clarke's name for the last two minutes with no response. With each passing second, she grows more worried. The rain chills her to the bone and her kit is soaking, but she doesn't even think about going back inside without finding Clarke first._

_"Clarke!" Raven wanders onto the waterlogged pitch and almost trips over a small cone concealed by the torrential rain. Narrowly avoiding stepping in a forming puddle, she squints her eyes and a shape slowly starts to form near the far goalpost. Before she even realises what she's doing, her feet are already running towards the person sat on the ground._

_It's Clarke, and she's crying._

_Or at least Raven thinks she is, it's impossible to tell in the rain by just looking at Clarke's face. As she steps closer, the sobbing sounds erupting from her chest are easier to distinguish and Raven cautiously approaches her._

_"Clarke?" It must be the tenth time she's said her name within the last few minutes, but this time it's with an extra softness. Clarke looks up from where she had been resting her head on her crossed arms over her knees._

_"Go inside Raven." Clarke's voice is as shaky as her bottom lip and she hides her face from Raven once more. Instead of doing what Clarke had asked (since when does Raven ever do that anyway) she decides to sit right next to Clarke and doesn't say anything. She tilts her head towards the dark grey sky and lets the rain hit her harshly on her face. It's refreshing, surprisingly so. The sky crackles with thunder and she waits for the flash of lightning to follow with baited breath. In the blink of an eye, the fork of electricity touches a hill in the distance and Raven smiles._

_"I wonder what's upset him this time?" Raven raises her voice as the thunderstorm reaches its crescendo, immersing her and Clarke as if they were underwater in a pool._

_"What?" Clarke says confused, and Raven pretends not to notice, but Clarke shifts closer and her knee knocks against Raven's._

_"Zeus. He's clearly angry about something." she waves a hand in the general direction of where the lightning bolt had struck earlier. "Maybe he's fathered another child he didn't want. Guy should learn to use a condom."_

_For the first time since finding her, Clarke starts to smile. "I doubt there's a condom anywhere in the universe powerful enough to stop Zeus."_

_Raven laughs loudly, then nudges Clarke with her elbow. "What's up? And if you say the sky I'm gonna ask the almighty Zeus to send a lightning bolt your way."_

_"I don't know if I can do this." Clarke cuts the joking short and Raven has to strain to hear her. "The season's almost finished and then it's the big stage. I can't do it Raven."_

_Raven grabs Clarke's hand and pulls her in for a hug. It's awkward to begin with as they both find their position against each other, made more difficult by being sat on the ground. Clarke rests her head against Raven's shoulder for a brief second and then pulls away. She responds by using her free hand to nudge Clarke under her chin and face her._

_"Hey superstar," her voice is gentle and teasing, and Clarke makes a mmm sound barely audible in the rain and stares directly into Raven's eyes, "you can do this. I know you can, I believe it with all my heart. How many goals have you scored this season? How many assists? I recall you winning the golden boot again or was that something I dreamed?"_

_"Dream about me a lot do you Reyes?" Clarke's quip back at Raven signals to her that she's starting to come around and she smirks._

_"Oh yeah all the time. Preferably you're in a bikini, or perhaps naked-" Clarke slaps Raven lightly on the arm to cut her off._

_"In my dreams, you have duct tape over your mouth so you can't talk." Clarke says and Raven pretends to be offended until the comeback comes to her as naturally as it always does when talking to Clarke._

_"Duct tape over my mouth? Kinky." she laughs and Clarke rolls her eyes. "As I was saying, you're amazing, my little superstar. The facts don't lie."_

_"I wish you'd stop saying little, you're literally an inch taller than me." Clarke grumbles and Raven can't resist._

_"An inch can make all the difference, just ask that guy I was-" Clarke puts her hand over Raven's mouth this time. She shakes it off, grinning._

_"You're the gayest person I know, the joke only works if you're actually into guys."_

_"Fuck you no one polices my jokes." the rain starts to ease and there's no longer any need for them to raise their voices. Raven decides she's had enough of sitting in a puddle and stands up, practically dragging Clarke up with her. She winks at her which elicits a shy smile from Clarke. They start the walk back into the changing rooms, Raven shaking her head like a wet dog to amuse Clarke._

_"Hey Raven?" she stops heading for the showers and turns back to face Clarke, who is holding a towel against her chest. "Thank you."_

_She nods, understanding the power and meaning behind the two words._

_"If I get pneumonia because you were having an early mid life crisis, I'll climb out of my coffin and haunt you beyond the grave myself, Griffin." she says chuckling, and steps into the shower, pulling the door closed behind her._

_She misses the way Clarke clutches the towel just that little bit tighter and whispers, "You already haunt me, Reyes."_

 

//

 

"What are you doing?" Raven jogs directly onto the track and starts doing stretches in front of Clarke's path, who has to slow down or end up hitting Raven. She's underestimated Raven's stubbornness once before and that was a mistake she prefers to forget all about.

"What does it look like I'm doing? Swimming?" she stops completely, gratefully accepting a water bottle from Raven.

"Hey, no need for sarcasm, that's my job. I meant why are you pushing yourself to run laps when we have a game tonight? On that pitch right over there. The last friendly before Rio." Raven mimes punching Clarke in the stomach and throws up a boxer's stance. "I'm pumped."

Clarke raises an eyebrow. "I can tell, how many coffee's have you had?"

Raven shakes her head quickly, and starts walking next to Clarke as they find their way back to the meeting room to get debriefed before the game. "Not coffee. Had sugar with practically everything I've eaten today. A lot of it. What's the maximum amount someone can have in a day? Cause I feel like I've exceeded that." she starts rambling about sugar intake and her meals, and Clarke has to stop herself from thinking about how adorable she finds it. She finds a lot of things Raven does adorable recently. It's not a good sign, and so her solution is to just ignore it until it either goes away, or it implodes. She hopes it's the former and not the latter.

"Nice of you to join us Clarke." her mother's voice causes her to snap her head up. "I was beginning to think you got lost and so I sent Raven to find you." Usually at these meetings, Marcus Kane, their assistant coach (and Abby's new boyfriend as Clarke had the unfortunate experience of finding out by walking into her mother's office late one night to find she wasn't _alone_ ), usually tells them the team sheet and the last minute changes to tactics whilst Abby prepares for the press conference. However, to Clarke's surprise her mother is sat at the head of the table, surrounded by the majority of her staff and the whole team including a few faces she recognises from the youth squad.

"What is this, an intervention? Have my daily requests for chocolate milkshakes to the kitchen gone too far?" Clarke says dryly, trying to figure out what is different about this game specifically, but coming up empty. Abby rolls her eyes, and she can't deny that's when she looks most like her mother.

"Not quite." Marcus smiles at her and gestures for her to take the empty seat nearest to the door but on the edge of the centre of the table. She quickly throws a nervous glance at Raven who had gone to stand behind Octavia. Raven nods and gives her a reassuring look and it gives Clarke the confidence to take a seat. Everyone stares at either her or Abby and there's an awkward ten second silence.

"So I was thinking our next kit should be bright fluorescent yellow-" Raven takes the initiative to break the silence and the younger players snigger at her interruption.

"That's quite enough Raven. I want to thank all of you for being here, even if a few of you were late-" Clarke doesn't miss Abby's dig, "- and I just want to say a few words. It's been a long four years since London and despite the fact we've lost a few of our older experienced faces, our youth squad has never looked so promising and so the future is bright. Now I'm talking to the players I am taking with me to Rio. I'm so proud of you and whilst we've had a few struggles and injuries, I wouldn't change this for the world. Rio is going to be where we shine. Where we show the whole world what we're made of. That we're no longer silver Olympians but rather gold."

The team starts to cheer and clap, but Clarke knows this isn't what Abby is here to say, and she's proved right as her mother holds up a hand to stop the noise. They simmer down at once. Then, again surprising her, Abby looks directly at Clarke and stands up.

"Clarke. It's undeniable you're one of the best strikers we've ever had. But you're also a team player. Everyone here knows you, everyone here loves you. Most importantly they respect you. They listen to you. And that's why I'm handing this to you and I hope you take this with all the responsibility it entails." Abby leans across the table and throws something in Clarke's direction. It lands right in front of her on the table and she gasps.

The captain's armband.

_Holy shit._

"What?" Clarke can't take her eyes off the item. The word _captain_ is burned into her mind. _Captain captain captain_. Her heart thumps so loudly she's certain Raven can hear it from across the table.

Abby smiles. "We all had a meeting about it and it was an unanimous decision Clarke. Everyone agreed it was natural for you to be the next captain."

Last year, the previous captain had announced her retirement from the game, leaving the whole nation wondering who would be her replacement. Clarke had just assumed it would go to one of the older more experienced players left in the team, but never in a million years would she ever have thought it would go to her. She's only twenty-two years old for gods sake. How the fuck can she be captain? This is some kind of record surely.

"What?" she says again and a few of her teammates laugh at how dumbstruck she must look. With trembling fingers she picks up the armband and threads her hand through it, letting it rest on her forearm. _Captain_.

"Clarke you're more than capable of doing the job. You practically took over the role anyway. You probably didn't notice of course, but you're a natural born leader it's what you do." Abby speaks again and Clarke would be laughing at the fact this is the most praise her mother has shown her in front of the whole team since she first kicked a soccer ball, but she's still too in shock.

"You helped me organise my walls when I was unsure." their main goalkeeper Harper speaks up and Clarke finally tears her eyes away from the armband to look at her teammates.

"You kept yelling at me when I was out of position and not marking my opponent." Echo, an attack-minded midfielder, says.

"You told me to keep an eye on our offside line. Even though I know how to do that myself thank you very much." Octavia, the strongest and most vicious centre-back as well as Clarke's other closest friend, crosses her arms and huffs, but there's humour in her eyes. Slowly coming out of her daze, Clarke can recall telling her teammates these things during matches, but she just assumed other people were doing it as well. She was only helping them. To win the game.

"I- I didn't mean to." she mumbles, suddenly embarrassed.

"You told me to stop fucking around and make runs in behind defenders." Raven laughs as Abby chastises her for swearing in front of the younger players but it's all Clarke needs to start smiling too. It starts to actually sink in. She's captain of the _national team_.

"Captain. Wow." she breathes and slides the armband the whole way up to her bicep, where it sits snug and she grins.

"Just don't expect me to start calling you Captain America." Raven smirks and Clarke shoots her a glare as the rest of the team laugh alongside Raven. If there was anyone to make her feel happier than she does with the band on her arm, it would be Raven fucking Reyes.

"Okay so now that's over, I hope I can expect you to join me in the press conference in an hour to make the announcement to the world, Clarke." Abby indicates for Marcus to confirm the line-up and the rest of the plans before the game as if nothing had happened.

"Wait what?"

"You too Raven."

"Come again?"

Abby ignores both Clarke and Raven's questions and leaves the room with her other staff members, and they miss their opportunity to ask Abby any further questions as the team members not needed for the starting line-up begin to filter out of the room too. Marcus and nine other girls crowd around a clipboard with Abby's instructions on them, and Clarke and Raven stand near a window, looking down on the pitch.

"It's a hell of a view isn't it?" Clarke whispers and turns to look at Raven, who was already facing her.

"Sure... captain."

Clarke can't help the smile that appears on her face. "Captain is better than superstar."

"I like both." Raven concedes.

"How long have you known?"

"All my life I've known I was gay-" Raven says theatrically, and Clarke resists the urge to smack her on the arm. Raven senses she should probably stop annoying Clarke before they go into an important press conference because that could end disastrously, and so she answers the question. "A week."

"A week?" Clarke exclaims and Octavia looks up from across the table at them. She ignores her and scowls. "How could you keep something like that from me, your best friend, for a _week_?"

"I had to, Abby threatened to chop my legs off. And I need 'em, I'm a winger." Raven protests. So much for not annoying her.

"Girls? Will you be joining us at all?" Marcus clears his throat and addresses them and Clarke storms over to look at the papers. Raven exhales quickly and joins her, but makes sure to stay on the opposite side of the room until Clarke calms down. She understands why Clarke would be annoyed at the fact Raven kept something like that from her for a week alongside everyone else in the team, and made Clarke feel like an outsider again, but surely she must understand herself that Raven couldn't tell her? It wasn't her place to, it was Abby's.

Before they even realise what the time is, their discussion gets interrupted by Jackson, Abby's other right hand man, who tells Clarke and Raven they need to get down to the conference room immediately. For obvious reasons, they make Clarke remove the armband and it's weird how much she was already getting used to the sensation of it on her arm.

Clarke still isn't talking to Raven, and chooses to ask Jackson questions about things that might come up in the Q&A. Raven stays silent the whole walk there.

"It's just a routine pre-game talk, you've done it plenty of times before, you'll be fine. As for the captain announcement - congratulations by the way - Abby is taking the lead on it and you've just got to talk about how proud and happy you are that's all." Jackson reassures them and hands them over to the tech guys who already start fixing microphones to their shirts. Raven starts to say something to Clarke but before she can even get two words out, they're being pushed through a door and into the room, where they're hit by the light of a dozen flashing cameras.

Abby sits in the centre, sipping water from a clear plastic cup and looking like she had been waiting there for days, completely comfortable and in her element. If there's one thing Abby Griffin loves as much as coaching her girls, it's her ability to avoid answering specific questions but still sounding like she gives a satisfactory answer. In other words, she can bullshit and she's good at it. She gets asked many controversial questions about her players and always feels defensive of them. Especially when it comes to her own daughter; who she now indicates to sit on the empty seats on the left side of her. Raven follows closely behind.

They pose for a few more photos sat next to each other and then the interviewer, a guy Clarke remembers from previous matches, signals for the conference to begin.

"Well good afternoon everyone and welcome to the pre-match press conference of team USA. We have, as I'm sure you recognise, the head coach Abby Griffin, and we're also lucky enough to be joined by two of the team's star players, Clarke Griffin and Raven Reyes." he waits until the photographers cameras stop clicking rapidly and resumes his well-rehearsed speech. "I'm sure the press have a lot of questions to ask but could you just tell us in your own words a brief summary of how prepared you feel going into the last friendly match before the Olympics."

Abby leans forward closer to the microphone. "Well obviously we're a strong side, we have the depth and the ability to prove to our critics that even though this is just a friendly, it's still a match we're taking seriously and it's a way for me to maybe see how my line-ups might be for Rio."

"Clarke?"

"I think we've definitely learned and grown as a team and yeah I'm excited for the Olympics but I think it's important to focus on this game as well, y'know if we get off to a good start here it's a good sign for later on." Clarke says and takes a sip of water, hiding and internalising how she feels. Despite the many times she's done this alongside her mother, she still gets slightly nervous she'll slip up and say something she can't take back. Live in front of all of the cameras. And this time it's a lot more personal to her.

"Okay well normally we would switch to questions now from our audience but I know you have something very important to say..." the interviewer trails off and leaves it open for Abby to make the announcement. Suddenly the flashing lights and murmurs from the audience seem heightened and Clarke swallows thickly. It feels like there's something stuck in her throat and so she takes another drink, but it doesn't help. Why does she feel so sick? Is it even possible to come down with the flu this quickly? Her palms feel unnaturally sweaty and she avoids eye contact with the people in the front, instead choosing to focus on a particular smudge on the cream wall at the far end of the room. Abby begins her speech about how the team have been left without a leader and Clarke blinks heavily. What if they don't think she's ready? What if they say she doesn't deserve to be captain? How the fuck did she think she could lead the national team when she can't even get through a simple fucking press conference?

She's two seconds away from doing something drastic like saying fuck it and bolting from her seat when she feels it.

Raven's hand on her lower thigh.

She doesn't react, and in her peripheral vision she can see Raven still staring at Abby as she continues talking, not even making a move to suggest anything has changed. But it has and she can feel Raven squeeze her thigh to calm her down. To reassure her it's going to be okay. To let her know that Raven is right by her side like she always is and always will be.

All it takes is the warmth and security of Raven's touch to bring her back to normality, and it happens just in time as Abby turns to face her. She tunes into what Abby is saying.

"... which is why we've decided to hand the captaincy over to Clarke."

Immediately, there's a loud outburst from eager and shocked reporters, all desperate to ask the first question to the USWNT's new captain. The cameras flash quicker than before, and phones are yanked from pockets as they try to be the first to break the news on social media.

"Thank you! Some quiet please!" the interviewer struggles to get the crowd to be quiet, but as soon as they realise nothing more will be said until they do, the noise simmers to a murmur once more. "Abby do you want to elaborate?"

Abby smiles and leans into the microphone once more. "I think it's-"

Suddenly she's cut off as Raven coughs awkwardly. "Do you mind if I take this one?" she asks softly and Abby, slightly offended to have been interrupted but curious as to what Raven has to say, nods for her to continue. Clarke freezes as Raven's hand slips from her thigh and she prays that whatever Raven has to say she can keep her composure.

Raven turns to face Clarke. "Oh captain, my captain!" The crowd laugh at Raven's reference and the joke she knows was for her benefit; to reassure her that Raven's going to keep things light and calm. "When Abby first approached me and asked me the question about whether you should be captain or not, there was only one answer in my mind and I knew it straight away."

"She didn't hesitate." Abby adds, and remembers how Raven's face lit up as soon as the words were out of her mouth.

"Yeah I didn't. Because I know that there's no-one on this entire planet that deserves it more than you," she gives Clarke a soft smile and turns to face the crowd. "The girl sitting next to me is the most hardest working girl I know. She puts in an incredible amount of work, and it shows both on and off the pitch-" a few of the reporters chuckle at the implication and Clarke struggles to hide her cheeks blushing, "- no I didn't mean it like that! Way to continue the rumours Raven jeez... no, I meant that she's an athlete and leader on the pitch, but also off it when we're team building or just hanging out, the connection is there. As a team, and I'm sure I speak for all of us collectively here, we look to Clarke as a leader and we respect her. I mean, not many people our age, this young, have the kind of track record Clarke does. She's just amazing and I can't think of anyone else I'd rather have as my captain, leading me out on the pitch. Or telling me to get my ass in gear you know, either works." Raven grins and the reporters scramble to finish writing down the speech. Clarke sits there as shocked as she was when she found out about the captaincy. Her heart pounds in her chest like a jackhammer and she can't tell if that's because of how she felt earlier, or because listening to Raven sing her praises like that feeds the slither of hope in her mind she chooses to block out. Until it implodes. That's something she's now pretty certain of.

"I couldn't have said it any better myself." Abby reaches out and squeezes Clarke on the shoulder, bringing her back into the room. She exhales quickly and licks her lips.

"I'm still in shock over the amount of incredible support I am getting from my teammates, and I do want to give a special mention to the two people sat next to me right now, who without this would have been impossible. Mom- I mean Coach..." the reporters are back to chuckling and it fuels her confidence, "I want to thank you for kicking that ball at me when I was three years old and not giving up on driving me to trials after trials even when you had your own coaching commitments. And Raven? You're my best friend, my rock, and my number one always." she feels like her speech is too short and lame compared to what Raven had just said, but she turns to face her and Raven blinks heavily and gives her one of the brightest, heartwarming smiles she's ever seen.

"You're _my_ number one." Raven grins. The reporters collectively _aww_ and Abby quickly indicates to the interviewer to begin the questions. They're reaching _that_ kind of territory and Abby does her best to dispel those rumours for fear they'd tear them all apart.

 

//

 

_"Claven?" Raven repeats and Abby gives a long sigh. Clarke and Raven had been called into her office early before training for their first game of 2013. It's a subject she had been putting off for a while but she thinks it's time to let the girls into what she'd been worried about._

_"It's come to my attention that a lot of people have been using that hashtag under pictures of you both that you post online. You know on the Instagram and Snapchat."_

_"Mom, no-one says the Instagram-" Clarke laughs but she soon stops after seeing Abby's stern expression._

_"This is serious."_

_"Right. So what's wrong if they're commenting it all the time?" Raven asks. Her and Clarke both know it's an amalgamation of their names, and they both are distinctly aware of the fact it means people, mostly girls, think or want them to be in a relationship. Neither of them have actually addressed it, but they both can understand why people would think that about them. They've both been out and advocating for gay rights since the beginning of their public career, and as some of the only queer girls on the team that are of a similar age and hang out all the time, they can see how some of their actions can be taken as... romantic. Even sexual. But they're just friends._

_"They believe you two are together." Abby pauses, thinking how to ask the next part as delicately as she can. "There's some pretty damning evidence out there, some of those girls make gifs of moments I wouldn't even have assumed to be romantic. If I didn't know you both I would assume it's all true. But I just want to check, well ask really, I don't mean anything by it but-"_

_"Mom just ask." Clarke knows exactly where Abby is going with her line of questioning and she can feel Raven shift uncomfortably on the couch next to her._

_"Are you two sleeping together?"_

_"Mom-"_

_"What?"_

_"I thought you were going to ask whether we were just together-"_

_"Oh. Well are you?" Abby says and stares at them both. Raven can't hold it in anymore and starts laughing. Clarke and Abby glare at her._

_"Sorry it's just- well it's just funny that Abby has been on the Claven hashtag and Clarke is yet to deny sleeping with me." she starts laughing even harder at Clarke's bewildered expression._

_"That's not-"_

_"This is not funny, Raven." Abby says harshly._

_"Okay well just to reassure you, no I'm not sleeping with your daughter, I would tell you if I was. Believe me you'd know about it, I wouldn't keep something like that a secret. And this conversation is ridiculous. I have weights to lift so..." Raven holds her hands up to indicate she's finished with the conversation and leaves the office, still slightly laughing. Clarke remains on the couch, unsure as to whether that was her cue to leave as well._

_"Did you hear the part where she said she wouldn't keep you two a secret?" Abby smirks and Clarke takes that as her definite cue to leave._

_She's glad to have brought it up to them, despite their reactions. She knows that sometimes the pressure from fans can be brutal and the last thing she wants is for this Claven thing to affect Clarke and Raven's relationship, whether that's their working one or friendship. She'd have to keep a close eye on what they post on social media from now on._

_Besides, if they do end up together it wouldn't be the worst thing. Raven is good for her daughter she knows that much._

 

//

 

"... thank you I'm afraid that's all we have time for today! I'm sure these girls need to get ready for the game and we've kept them longer than we should have because of the special announcement. So let's wrap things up. Thank you all for coming." the interviewer finishes the press conference and the three girls head towards the changing rooms. Abby walks into the room, but before Raven has a chance to follow her, Clarke pulls her back.

"Did you mean what you said?" Clarke is distinctly aware that she's still gripping Raven's bicep.

"Yeah. You are my superstar after all." Raven murmurs and stares at Clarke, wondering why she would ever doubt her.

"I know, just checking."

"Now go score some goals Clarke Griffin, and when you do the first round is on me."

 

//

 

**MATCH REPORT**

**Match** : US Women's National Team vs. Costa Rica  
**Date** : July 22nd, 2016  
**Competition** : International Friendly  
**Venue** : Children's Mercy Park; Kansas City, Kansas  
**Kickoff** : 8.p.m. CT  
**Attendance** : 12,678  
**Weather** : 89 degrees; Clear

**Scoring Summary:**

USA- Clarke Griffin (Raven Reyes) 16th minute  
USA- Clarke Griffin (Raven Reyes) 34th minute  
USA- Zoe Monroe (Clarke Griffin) 69th minute  
USA- Raven Reyes (Clarke Griffin) 90+1 minute


	2. can't keep my hands to myself (i mean i could but why would i want to?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the title of this chapter sums it up tbh
> 
> anyways it switches to Raven's POV for the last half ish, it's easy to see where but I wanted to show how she feels as well in this chapter as it's important for the next one... Take that as you will.

She still can't quite believe she's going. Not even when Raven wakes her up at six a.m. with a phone call, yelling at her through the receiver that today is the day they fly to another country to compete for gold. Clarke can't handle that amount of peppy Raven that early in a morning without having at least four cups of coffee minimum first. She's only on her second cup when Raven knocks on her apartment door and crushes her in a bear hug as soon as she opens the latch. She buries her face in Raven's shoulder and breathes in softly.

It may be soppy and slightly creepy, but Raven is one of her favourite scents.

Raven offers to pull her suitcase and Clarke gratefully accepts as it means she can pour the rest of her coffee into a flask without struggling to balance the two. She gives her apartment one last look over and silently says goodbye. There's only going to be one outcome by the time she comes back to New York.

Gold or no gold.

The drive to John F. Kennedy International Airport is a relatively short journey, and Clarke finds herself yawning despite the two cups of coffee. Her body really doesn't agree with getting up at 6 a.m. and she wonders, not for the first time, how Raven can possibly get up this early and go to the gym nearly every morning. Well, that's probably why Raven has the muscles she does. And now she's thinking about Raven in her sports bra and it's really _not_ appropriate at all-

"How much longer?" Raven's voice breaks Clarke from her train of thought and she faces the window so Raven can't see her blushing profusely.

Their Uber driver glances his GPS and murmurs they have approximately twenty-five minutes, depending on traffic. Checking the driver had directed his focus back onto the road fully, Raven quickly unclips her seatbelt and slides into the middle seat, pushing up against Clarke as she reattaches the seatbelt.

"You can rest your head on me for a bit. I know you're tired." she whispers into Clarke's ear. The shiver down Clarke's spine is involuntary and she bites her lip. She shouldn't be having these type of reactions to her best friend. It's scary and it's dangerous. Before she can think about it too much, she leans her head on Raven's shoulder and shuts her eyes.

She would have got some sleep if it wasn't for Raven rubbing her thumb over Clarke's knee at random intervals during the journey. So much for not thinking about it.

They're met at the airport with screaming from some of their overly-excited teammates as they're reunited. Abby had decided to fly the team out from New York as most of her main players lived or worked near the city, and the others who resided in other states had already decided to stay with close friends or other teammates after their last friendly match, so they all could arrive in Rio together. Clarke and Raven have apartments within ten minutes of each other and spend the majority of their free time hanging out or training together, and so arriving to the airport as a pair was always the plan.

Octavia throws her arm around Clarke's shoulders and gives her a hug as a porter takes her luggage from Raven's hand to be checked in. Clarke's not entirely sure how Raven ended up with both of their suitcases after the drive here as well, but she realises that's how a lot of their interactions go recently. Raven does something totally sweet and considerate without Clarke even noticing until moments after. Simple things like saving Clarke the last slice of her favourite pizza, or getting her another drink whenever she was running low, or taking her hoodie off and giving it to her to wear when it's cold, or like just now when she carried her bags without Clarke even asking.

Raven Reyes is so fucking perfect and Clarke feels so incredibly guilty.

Guilty for her confused feelings, guilty for letting Raven do these things, guilty for not talking to Raven about it all.

Quickly, Raven throws a glance in her direction and falters. "Are you okay babe?" she asks and a few of the other girls look up at her. Shit. She fixes a false smile on her face and indicates in the direction of the boarding gate.

"Yeah I'm just tired and want to go already." Clarke replies and joins a conversation Octavia, Harper, and Monroe are having in order to deflect from Raven's questioning. Raven narrows her eyes but doesn't ask her anything further.

"... so then he kissed me goodbye this morning and as I pulled back, he surprised me with tickets to a concert for when we next see each other! He's so incredible." Octavia gushes, and Harper and Monroe make _aww_ noises. Clarke assumes the topic of conversation is about Lincoln, a player for the men's soccer team. He and Octavia had met at a Soccer Federation Ball last November, and had been practically glued to each other's sides since. Clarke's happy that Octavia's found someone as good and caring as Lincoln, and if it wasn't for so many current soccer commitments from both of them, she wouldn't put it past them to get married even this early. That's the kind of couple they are.

"Hello? Earth to Clarke?" Harper waves a hand in front of Clarke's face and laughs. "What ya daydreaming about, Griffin?" Harper's question earns another concerned glance from Raven, who pauses her conversation with Abby briefly to stare at Clarke. She smiles as genuinely as she can and it's enough for Raven to resume talking to Abby. She really needs to be more careful.

"Sorry what were you saying? I don't think I'm fully awake yet it's barely seven a.m." she says and the girls seem to accept her answer as enough.

"I was just pointing out how lucky Octavia is, Lincoln sounds so great. Do you think we'll have that one day?" Harper sighs and Clarke notices a subtle glance from Monroe. She's fairly certain they'll get together, it'll just take some time. They're too subtle and slow but they just fit together. How Harper can be so obvious to Monroe's crush she doesn't know, but it's almost funny.

"Yeah I'm sure of it." Clarke affirms and Harper links her arm through Monroe's and they make some small talk about tactics. Octavia begins the story of how Lincoln bought the concert tickets, but Clarke's not really listening and her mind wanders back to Harper's question. _Do you think we'll have that one day?_

She can't stop herself from thinking that her _one day_ involves a certain brown haired girl with soft safe hands and a bright smile.

Well fuck.

 

//

 

_She feels like she's in middle school all over again, the 'back to school' nerves settle in the pit of her stomach uncomfortably. It's her first proper training session with the Arkers in New York, having just moved into her apartment only a few days ago. She's procrastinating unpacking, whether that's due to her just being lazy, or how inevitably final her move to the Big Apple will feel when it's all done. Her place feels empty and the past few nights she's struggled with homesickness, even going to the extent of ringing her mom to talk about whether she needs to buy more milk, because you can't ever have enough milk right? Abby had put the phone down within two minutes of that call, stressing about a meeting she had with the federation the next day._

_In her negotiations with the Arkers, she'd met with the board and the chairman of course, and Indra the coach. She knows Octavia and a few of the older players from the London 2012 squad, but other than that she's still the newbie. Moving to the Arkers is completely new territory, and she's scared. A guy she's already forgotten the name of greets her at the door, signs her in and gives her a quick tour. He flashes her a wide Cheshire-cat grin and rests his cool hand on her lower back as he steers her through the Arkers training complex to the pitch, where there's sounds of laughter and conversation bubbling from outside._

_"I'll leave you to it. Welcome to New York!" he says and as quickly as he appeared, he's gone, talking rapidly into his Bluetooth earpiece._

_"Hi I'm Raven."_

_A voice causes her to turn around and she comes face to face with probably one of the hottest girls she's ever met._

_That's her first impression._

_Her second is that the girl,_ Raven _, has the warmest brown eyes she's ever seen and she can't stop staring. Her silky hair is tied into a ponytail and the warmth of the sun makes her skin glow. Is this what Greek Goddesses are supposed to look like?_

_"I would ask you your name but practically the whole country knows it by now." Raven gives her a warm smile and despite all her pre-training jitters, her nerves start to settle._

_"Hey, Raven! Stop hitting on the new girl and bring her over here. She's not interested in you." Octavia calls across the pitch and the group of girls surrounding her start to laugh. Raven bites her lip and shrugs, and Clarke tries and fails to stop herself from staring at her._

_"Ignore them. They're joking. I'm just being friendly to our new cute striker that's all." she winks and offers her hand for Clarke to shake. She grips Raven's palm and finds her hands are softer than she thought they would be._

_"You think I'm cute?" Clarke's first words to Raven are asking her whether she finds her attractive. Oh god. She can't help that flirting with girls comes naturally to her, she is Clarke Griffin after all. But the again, she probably shouldn't have said that to her new teammate, who's smiling wildly at her. That's a good sign, right?_

_"Maybe I_ should _start hitting on the new girl." Raven smirks and before Clarke can reply, she starts walking towards Octavia, flashing her and the group of girls her middle finger. Clarke is left standing there feeling more dazed than ever before._

She thinks I'm cute.

_She's only been here for ten minutes, but already she feels like it's the start of something special._

 

//

 

"Excuse me is this seat taken?"

Clarke snaps her head up to see Raven pointing to the empty seat next to her. She frowns and cranes her neck to see Octavia sitting down in a completely different assigned seat, right across the aisle from her. Raven follows her line of sight and rolls her eyes.

"If you didn't want to sit next to me you could've just said."

"Raven that's not-"

"Octavia wanted a window seat anyway so I traded with her. Nothing to do with you." Raven slides her carry-on bag in the overhead compartment and sits down in the empty seat, ignoring Clarke as best as she can. She puts her earphones in and Clarke can faintly hear the tinny music coming from them.

"Raven..." Clarke tries again but Raven closes her eyes and clenches her jaw. Clarke knows Raven has gone into stubborn mode and she sighs. Fuck.

The air stewardess interrupts Clarke's awkward shuffling as she tries to get Raven's attention. "We'll be taking off soon, so please sit back and we hope you enjoy the flight with us today."

Raven opens her eyes and smiles at the air stewardess, openly checking her out. The air stewardess smirks back at her and pretends to check that Raven's seat is in its proper position for take off, and she doesn't work on a plane or have any flight attendant training but Clarke very well knows it's in its proper fucking position. She casually drapes her hand over Raven's shoulder as she walks past, and winks goodbye. A bolt of jealousy shoots through Clarke and she has to look away. Her throat seems as dry as it was during the press conference, except this time for a completely different reason.

The rumble of the engine shocks Clarke, who hadn't expected it to turn on yet. The sensation of the plane moving, alongside the weird smell in the cabin, and the uncomfortable swirling inside her chest, makes her grip the armrests tightly and exhale. She furrows her brow and tries not to throw up. What the fuck is wrong with her? She never gets sick on planes; she thoroughly enjoys flying and looking out of the small window as clouds and land pass by. Now she can't even think about looking out of the window as the engines roar loudly and the plane accelerates down the runway. She focuses on the seat in front of her, trying to slow her breathing. Please don't throw up. For fucks sake.

Then she feels Raven's hand slip into hers. She doesn't look in her direction, just grips her hand tight as the plane wheels lift off from the ground. Raven leans into Clarke's side and rests her forehead against Clarke's head.

"You're okay." she murmurs and her voice soothes Clarke's nerves immediately. Clarke squeezes Raven's hand again and turns her head slightly, so their foreheads are resting against each other.

"Now I am." Clarke mumbles and Raven smiles, then pulls back and gives Clarke's hand one last tug before breaking contact and reaching for her earphones again. However, before putting them back in her ears she pauses.

"I'm sorry. About before. I was being rude."

"No I'm sorry, I'm just tired and I know that's a lame excuse but I am. I don't mean to upset you." she hopes Raven can tell she's being sincere, but also she prays she won't pick up on the omission of the other reasons as to why she's acting the way she is.

"I know baby. Do you want to sleep on me?" Raven asks and Clarke nods, already sliding the armrest up and snuggling into Raven's side. Raven reaches over with her right arm and pulls her closer, resting her palm against Clarke's lower back to steady her.

She falls asleep before her brain even fully registers what Raven had called her.

It feels like she had only just shut her eyes when Raven shakes her awake in order to eat some lunch. She picks at the salad, not feeling particularly hungry, and tries to ignore the judgemental look from a flight attendant as they take the leftovers away from her.

"What are you watching?" she asks Raven, who taps the screen to pause her film.

"Deadpool." she replies. Clarke briefly smiles as she recalls the evening out that they took to the small local cinema to watch the film when it first came out. She'd posted a picture of them on Instagram sat together and captioned the image "#datenight". Abby wasn't impressed, but the Claven shippers sure enjoyed themselves.

"I'm bored." Clarke whines, too wound up and uncomfortable to sleep, and too fidgety to focus on anything long like a film. Raven pulls her earphones out completely and tucks them into the seat pocket in front of her, then turns to face Clarke.

"Would you rather sleep with Donald Trump or eat dog shit?" Raven grins.

"Eat dog shit, it'd have a nicer aftertaste." Clarke laughs as Raven scrunches her nose in disgust. "Would you rather be trapped in an elevator for three days, or be stuck in a room with a hungry lion for an hour?"

Raven takes a moment to think and then says, "The lion. We'd bond over how hungry we both are. Would you rather sleep with me or that hot air stewardess from earlier?" Raven asks, completely oblivious to what had happened earlier, and Clarke tries very hard to keep her expression neutral. She hopes her answer doesn't appear to have been decided too quickly.

"You of course." she says and Raven raises an eyebrow and smirks.

"It's cause I'm so irresistible."

"Sure whatever you tell yourself to make yourself feel better." Clarke says and Raven narrows her eyes.

"You find me irresistible, I don't understand why you won't admit it, Griffin. It's nothing to be ashamed of, y'know, that I'm hotter than you." Raven replies with full bravado and Clarke knows the game is well and truly on now.

"Oh so it was you that was voted most desirable female soccer player of 2015 then? Or was that me? I think it was me."

"Fuck off, you know that's a sore subject with me. I came second." Raven scowls.

"Do you always come second?" the words are out of Clarke's mouth before she can stop herself and she doesn't know what's funnier, Raven's comical 'O' as her mouth drops open, or the confused and slightly scared look an air steward gives her as he approaches their seats. Raven's mouth snaps shut and she waits until he completely passes them.

"Why don't you find out?" she shoots back and Clarke blinks heavily once, then laughs loudly.

"I bet you say that to all the girls." she says, and tries to get her heart to stop pounding so loudly at the mere thought of finding that out.

"You're the only girl for me." Raven replies, but the joking banter atmosphere has almost completely evaporated and it's become too serious. Raven's eyes are fixated on Clarke's lips and Clarke can't stop her heavy breathing.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"You two are so sweet!" a voice shatters the bubble they had become encompassed in, and Raven coughs awkwardly. Clarke glances up and makes eye contact with an old woman, who had twisted around in the seat in front of them to talk.

"Thank you?" Clarke mumbles, absolutely mortified that this old lady had actually heard the words _do you always come second_ come out of her mouth.

"You're a lovely couple." she says and her eyes dart between the two girls. "I'm Edna by the way. I couldn't help but overhear you say about being the only girl for her and it just made my heart swell!"

Raven stares at Clarke and still doesn't say anything, much to Clarke's frustration. That means it's up to Clarke to deny their relationship or... have some fun.

"Aw that's so kind of you to say," Clarke gives the woman a soft smile and reaches over to hold Raven's hand, "we just can't get enough of each other can we sweetheart?"

Raven slowly glances down at their intertwined fingers, then back up to Clarke, who sits there waiting patiently for her reaction.

Fine. Two can play this game.

"No we can't, baby." Raven snaps into action and leans over, brushing her lips against Clarke's cheek. It's Clarke's turn to freeze and the spot where Raven had kissed her burns as much as her cheeks probably are.

"How long have you been together?" Edna asks and rests her hands on the top of the seat to steady herself.

"Not long." Raven says and rests their hands in her lap. Clarke swallows nervously. This was a huge mistake.

"So you're going through that newlywed honeymoon phase? That's the best part. I remember when my husband-" Edna starts rambling about her partner- a lovely man called Derek they find out- and Clarke tries to remain calm but her heart is beating faster than she ever thought is possible, and Raven is doing that thing with her thumb again where she rubs it casually over Clarke's skin, this time on the side of her hand. If she reacts this way to pretending to date Raven, she can't even imagine what she would be like if they actually got together. Not that they would of course. Raven doesn't even like her that way, and Clarke's not entirely sure her feelings run any deeper than a silly crush, surely. Probably.

"- also you both look very familiar, are you sure we haven't met before?" Edna says and Clarke yanks her hand away from Raven as if she was on fire. Oops. She'd forgot that they're kinda famous. It happens.

(Especially when she's distracted by thinking about what it'd be like to hold Raven's hand in public. Officially.)

"No, no, you must have us confused with someone else." Clarke says and tries to put as much space as possible between her and Raven. Well, as much as she can when sat on a plane in a confined area. To accidentally have confirmed Claven when it's not even real would be her, and Abby's, worst nightmare. The PR alone would be hell.

"Yeah, we just have those type of friendly faces." Raven catches on to Clarke's panic and reaches for her earphones again. "I really don't mean to sound rude but she's feeling really tired and I was in the middle of a film..." Raven trails off and Edna catches the implication.

"Oh I'm sorry! Yes don't worry about it, I was planning to read my book anyway. It was really nice talking to you both, you're both very lovely girls. I wish you both the best in your relationship." Edna beams and turns back to sit into her seat, and as soon as she slides out of sight, Clarke breathes a sigh of relief.

"Ouch. Don't want to date me that badly huh?" Raven lowers her voice so Edna doesn't overhear them.

"No." Clarke says quickly, far too quickly, and Raven raises her eyebrow. "I just- I meant that, well just-" she ends up mumbling and Raven chuckles lightly.

"It's okay, Griffin. We know you find me irresistible, remember?"

 

//

 

Their first group game isn't until August 3rd, and so they have five days to acclimatise to their new living quarters, and the intense atmosphere of being enveloped in the Olympic village. The drive from the airport to Barra da Tijuca is fortunately not too long, as most of the USWNT are feeling the heat already.

The Olympic village is split up into colossal apartment buildings, with each country getting entire floors, or flats to themselves. The USA have one of the largest buildings, located near to the entrance of the village. A man called Pedro greets them off the coach, instructs some young boys to take the luggage to their assigned rooms, and guides them to their living complex, spouting facts about Brazil and the Olympics in general in rapid English. She's only been in the country for a few hours, but she can already tell she's going to fall in love with it.

"... and of course the rumours are true and yes we do supply condoms for those athletes that need them, there's nothing better than safe sex!" Pedro laughs at the expressions of the girls, then looks pointedly at Raven who is stood smirking. "What's the matter? Brought your own condoms with you?"

"I won't need 'em." Raven says, and a few of the girls start to giggle. Clarke has to hide her smile. Pedro may be a nice guy, but he has no idea what's about to hit him.

"Oh really? And why is that?" Pedro gives her a look as if to imply she's stupid for thinking she won't need condoms whilst having sex.

"I'm gay. A big lesbian. I love girls." Raven says and the whole team stops walking further into the village to watch the exchange.

"Oh." Pedro blushes.

"And I know there are some girls that do require a condom, but last I heard there's no openly trans women athletes in USA's squad this year. So my chances of needing one are extremely thin..." she shrugs and begins walking again, leading the way instead of Pedro, whose cheeks are tinged with pink.

"Why specifically in USA's squad Raven?" Octavia calls her out. "Interested in someone on our team particularly?"

Clarke's steps falter and she makes it her mission not to look at either Raven or Octavia. Instead she pretends to be taking in the scenery, and notices the array of flags that people had already begun to hang out of their windows.

"None of your business, Blake." Raven shoots back.

Huh, that's interesting. Raven usually has ready a better comeback to Octavia's comments about her love life, but not this time. Clarke can't help herself and she looks up to find Octavia already staring at her. Something unspoken passes between them and Clarke's eyes flitter back to Raven for one brief second. Octavia's eyes widen and she gives Clarke a reassuring look, then jogs to catch up to Raven.

"It's my business if you want to sleep with me, Reyes. I know you're secretly in love with me." Octavia says and the team chuckles at how absurd that sounds. Raven and Octavia are more like sisters than anything else. The moment has passed in humour, but Clarke still feels uneasy. Octavia now knows something, but what exactly she'll have to find out later. The walk to the apartments is left in silence between them, with Clarke, Raven, and Octavia all avoiding being near each other. Clarke's thankful for Pedro's voice speaking over the silence, until she realises he's issuing an apology about the elevators being out of service.

"It's just our luck the elevator is broken to our floor." Clarke moans as she climbs yet another set of stairs.

"You're a professional athlete." Octavia scoffs and Harper laughs loudly.

"I can still hate stairs can't I?" Clarke says, and then Raven uses this particular moment to sprint past her, taking the steps two at a time. She stands at the top, hands on hips, grinning.

"Come on slowpoke."

"You know what Reyes? I've had enough of you." Clarke sighs and pushes her out of the way. Raven follows, close on her heels.

"Oh thank god I thought I'd never get rid of you." Raven dodges Clarke's swipe at her and they follow their guide to their particular floor. They're still jokingly pushing at each other when Pedro stops and hands out the keycards with their room numbers on.

Raven's room is directly opposite hers.

"Is there any way I can change this?" Raven holds up her card at Pedro, who grins at Clarke's scowl.

"Okay we're done, never ever talk to me again." Clarke says coolly and slides the keycard into the lock. Raven winks at Pedro and thanks him for all of his help, then she forces her way into Clarke's room just as she tries to shut the door.

"I know it's only been five seconds since you told me never to talk to you again but I missed you." Raven pouts as Clarke starts unzipping her suitcase to unpack.

"I think that's a new record. But you're still not forgiven." Clarke replies and starts to sort her clothes into piles. Raven slowly walks towards her and gently pulls a shirt from Clarke's hand.

"What about if I said I think you look really hot in this top?" she holds it up and Clarke snatches it back.

"Nope that's not enough." Clarke's going to take full advantage of this moment and make Raven hold out for as long as possible, and Raven knows it. It's times like this where Clarke's certain Raven strays from the line that borders friendship and the point of no return.

"Superstar, I'm _sorry_." Raven is practically begging her now and her resolve almost cracks, but she bites her lip to stop herself from caving. Shit. Raven notices she's close and smiles wickedly.

"Whatever you're going to do, don't." she warns, but Raven's still moving closer, until she's only a couple of inches away from Clarke's body. She turns away, hoping that it puts more distance between them, but Raven closes the gap and presses her body against Clarke's back. The heat emitting from Raven's chest is nothing compared to when Clarke feels Raven's soft warm lips press to the back of her neck.

"Do you forgive me now?" she murmurs, her breath surprisingly cool against Clarke's skin. The contrast to her lips sends shivers down Clarke's spine. She clenches her fist to stop herself from moaning, from doing anything that Raven would take as sexual. But, _fuck_ , she's frustrated.

"Mmhm." Clarke can't speak, she can't think, she can't breathe, she doesn't know how to respond to anything except focus on the feel of Raven's touch against her body.

"Good." Raven says and abruptly takes a step back. The space between them and the loss of Raven's touch makes Clarke feel like she's just been doused in ice cold water and she hates that she responds this way. She hates she can't control her body's reactions no matter how hard she tries. And boy, she tries.

She'd tried. And now she's just going to give in.

She spins around and faces Raven again, staring at her directly, as if challenging her to do it again. Raven's eyes are twinkling with mischief and she cocks her head.

"How about you ditch the unpacking and we relax, like watch a film?" Raven suggests and moves the suitcase off the bed and leans it up against the wall, acting as if nothing had happened. Playing innocent.

Raven Reyes is anything but innocent.

"What did you have in mind?"

 

//

 

Raven stops over. Clarke wakes up in her arms.

They don't talk about it the next day.

 

//

 

Over the next few days, before the first group game against New Zealand in Belo Horizonte, the team settles into a routine. Up early in a morning for training, then back to the village to have lunch and wander to view the sights, then either the gym or swimming in one of the many pools in the afternoon. The evenings are reserved for team bonding over dinner, then they're free to do whatever they want, within reason of course. They still have to be up the next morning, bright and early, and be expected to have enough energy to kick a ball. That's really Abby's only rule. Don't get too drunk, don't stay out too late, and as long as you can still score a goal, then it's fine.

It's the penultimate night before the game, and Octavia convinces them to go to a nightclub that Pedro had raved about to her that day.

"It'll be so great, I promise we'll have an amazing time!" Octavia waves them goodbye as she goes into her room to get ready. Raven follows Clarke further down the corridor, but instead of turning their separate ways, Clarke impulsively grabs Raven's hand and pulls her towards her room.

"Help me decide what to wear?" she asks and Raven nods, letting Clarke lead her to sit down on the bed. She's too whipped to say no to her.

That's really only the beginning of the many issues she has with Clarke Griffin.

Number one is the fact she's pretty sure she has a major crush on her best friend.

She thinks she has ever since she met her that very first day. Who even calls their new teammate cute and implies she wants to hit on her? What the hell, Raven?

It's a sign really. That she was totally screwed right from the outset.

Clarke hasn't noticed of course. Because Raven is Raven, and she's confident with anything that has a pulse (bonus points for flirting if it's a girl), she assumes Clarke believes the way she acts towards her is how she acts towards everyone. But that's just not the case.

Clarke is special.

She just wishes Clarke could see that for herself.

It's why she calls her superstar and it's why she'd do anything, give up anything, for her.

In hindsight, she couldn't really make it anymore obvious. Friends don't just go around kissing the back of their friend's necks like it's normal. It's not.

And now Clarke is stripping in front of her and she suddenly finds that her shoes look extremely interesting.

"I was thinking of either the black or red dress? I also brought a blue one with me but it's not really the sort of thing you wear to go clubbing..." Clarke's voice turns into a mumble as she enters the bathroom, and not for the first time since they arrived in Brazil, Raven wonders what kind of situation she's got herself into now. Then, before she's even mentally prepared herself, Clarke walks out of the bathroom and Raven's first thought is that no-one can be _this_ gay.

Clarke looks phenomenal.

She chose to wear the red dress and Raven is glad she was sitting down because she feels weak at the knees. The dress cuts off mid thigh and she shakes the thought of resting her hands there from her head. That's dangerous thinking. The neck line is in a deep V shape, complementing Clarke's already amazing boobs.

"I'm guessing by your silence that this is a no?" Clarke frowns and soothes the middle of the dress down with her hands.

" _God no_. That's the one, believe me. I don't need to see anything else." Raven stands up and smiles. "Twirl for me?"

Clarke grins and turns around, and Raven really wishes she hadn't asked. If she wasn't gay before, she's pretty sure all it would've took was one glance at Clarke Griffin's ass in a short tight red dress. Fuck.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, you look beautiful." Raven says softly, and Clarke looks shy all of a sudden. She rubs the back of her neck nervously and then realises she's probably been staring at Clarke's chest for far too long. "I'm gonna go... get ready myself." she points in what she hopes is the right direction, and hurries out of the room, praying she didn't do anything to make Clarke feel uncomfortable. That's the last thing she wants.

She chooses her favourite pair of black skinny jeans and a low-cut top, complete with a black leather jacket and heels. It's nothing compared to Clarke's dress, but she doesn't feel like dressing up tonight. Not when she has Clarke on her arm. Everyone will be focused all on her, and she doesn't know whether that makes her proud or jealous.

That's what happens when you have a crush on your best friend.

She meets Octavia and Clarke outside the apartment building, deciding it was safer for her not to see Clarke again quite so soon. She's only just calmed down and recovered from that. She notices a few other members of the team like Harper and Monroe are standing outside too, chatting between them.

"They wanted to come." Octavia shrugs her shoulders. Raven moves next to Clarke and greets her by wrapping her arm around her waist and giving it a squeeze. She notices Clarke doesn't want her to let go.

"Or you wore them down until they just had to join us." Raven rolls her eyes and Clarke laughs.

"That's exactly what happened." Octavia says. "But who cares? More people to dance with!"

"Have you told Lincoln what we're doing tonight?" Raven asks but Octavia's already moving towards a car as it pulls up. Pedro's head emerges from the driver's open window and he waves wildly.

"Of course." Octavia calls back, and gestures for them to go into the car. She tells Harper that Pedro's sending another car for them soon, and Raven and Clarke slide into the back, whilst Octavia joins Pedro in the front.

From the outside, the entrance to the club looks like some small dodgy warehouse that Raven wouldn't ever go near, but she can tell by the long line of people to get in and the loud thumping music echoing down the street that she's in the right place. Inside, the atmosphere is humid and she regrets wearing jeans immediately. Groups of people swarm next to her, and she's too sober to deal with a club like this. The air presses in around her, as hot and sweaty as the dancers in the middle of the room. Raven glances around and recognises some of the athletes from other countries. The music blares so loudly she can feel the beat vibrate between her ribs. They push their way through the crowd, and Raven feels Clarke slip her hand into hers. Her heart skips a beat.

"Don't want to lose you this early on." Clarke has to practically yell into Raven's ear to be heard. Raven nods, gripping onto her hand tight, and makes a beeline for the bar, asking for two cocktails. The bartender, who sashays behind the till to get to them, accepts Raven's cash and hands them the drinks.

"What did you get?" Clarke accepts the glass and Raven leans in close to her in order to be heard.

"Something that looked like sex on the beach I think."

"Always have sex on your mind, Reyes?" Octavia appears from the crowd and Raven rolls her eyes.

"At least I could get some tonight." Raven quips back and she feels Clarke unlink their hands. It's stupid how much she misses the contact, and she takes a long gulp of the drink to settle her thoughts.

"Is that a challenge?"

"I don't know, would Lincoln mind?" Raven retaliates and Octavia grimaces.

"I wish he was here now." Octavia sighs, but all of a sudden her mood shifts as she raises her arms and whoops. "I love this song! Dance with me!" she moves straight to the dance floor. They glance sideways at each other.

"She doesn't even know this song. It's in Portuguese." Raven laughs and Clarke shrugs.

"At least she's having a good time." Clarke downs the rest of her drink like a shot, and puts the glass down on a table with a bang. She can tell there's something bothering Clarke, but she knows she won't get it out of her without at least three more drinks first, and so she walks back to the bar whilst Clarke joins Octavia in the middle of the dance floor. She orders two shots of vodka for herself and takes them quickly, letting the alcohol burn down her throat and set her stomach on fire. Liquid courage.

It's what she needs whenever she feels like this.

When she remembers Clarke isn't hers. Clearly, she did something so fucked up in a past life that she deserves this special kind of torture now. The relentless voice inside her head reminds her of the fact that Clarke isn't, or never will be, interested in her.

Fuck.

She really shouldn't have turned around.

Clarke is what she notices first which doesn't surprise her, not just because she's constantly hyper aware of her presence, but because she's the most incredible person in the room. It's what she looks at next that makes her stomach twist and turn like she's going to throw up the vodka shots. A tall man with toned muscles and curly black hair moves towards Clarke and slides his hands up her waist. She leans her body into him and he smiles wickedly, motivated by her reaction to his touch.

She can't bring herself to look away, even though it hurts her more than anything she's ever experienced before. She wonders why it isn't her over there dancing, resting her hands over Clarke's skin, and then she remembers why she was on her own by the bar in the first place. Clarke doesn't want her.

As she downs another shot, her sadness and longing twists into jealous anger and she clenches her jaw tight. Her head suddenly starts to pound louder than the beat of the next song, and she spares one last look at Clarke. She's grinding her hips and the guy has his arms wrapped around her. Octavia is nowhere to be seen.

She can't stay another second.

Grabbing her jacket off the chair, she spins around and almost bumps right into a small pretty Brazilian girl. She mumbles an apology but the girl just holds her hands up. She says something in Portuguese, and Raven, who's fluent in Spanish and good at languages, picks up some of the words. _Dance, drink?_ She's shocked at the offer, and for one mad moment she thinks of accepting it. To just lose herself with this girl and forget about what she really wants.

But she knows she can't. It would kill her.

Raven shakes her head and the girl shrugs and says something else, then glides past her. It sounded a lot like _your loss_. She follows the signs for the exit, and the humid midnight air envelops her as soon as she steps out of the door. Instead of finding a taxi or attempting to walk back to the village in the madness of these streets, she sighs and fumbles for her phone.

"I'll be right there."

Pedro arrives outside the club in record time and Raven's never been more grateful to see a familiar face. She slides into the front seat and he turns the music volume knob to mute on the dashboard controls.

"Something wrong, little bird?" he asks, and Raven smiles faintly at the nickname. Pedro has become a good friend of the soccer team, and ever since that first day where Raven said she was gay, Pedro seems to be eager to make it up to her for assuming she was straight. She's not at all offended by him, and his offers to help her are useful, and so she let him put his number in her phone and told her to ring him if she ever needed help. Like now.

"Just wasn't feeling it." Raven murmurs and rests her head against the cool glass car window. "I have a headache."

Pedro offers her a sip from his water bottle and she accepts gratefully. "Where are your friends?" he asks and she can't help herself from frowning.

"Still in there."

"Ah. It's the blonde one yes? The one causing you this trouble." he says, and Raven is surprised at his question. Perhaps he's more astute than she gives him credit for. So there's really no point in hiding it from him, and maybe he could actually offer some helpful advice. She certainly needs it.

"Yeah. She was dancing with some guy and I couldn't-" she cuts off to stop herself from thinking about it all again and Pedro grips the wheel tighter.

"Have you told her of your feelings?"

"No, but I haven't _not_ told her. If that even makes sense, I don't know." Raven sighs and takes another long gulp of water. Her headache slowly starts to ease.

"Do you want my honest opinion?"

"Yeah."

"You need to suck it up and tell her." Pedro says and Raven chuckles.

"It's not that simple."

"Why not?"

Why not Raven? Why can't you just tell her how you feel? It'd be less painful than staying where you are.

"Because-"

"Because you're scared of rejection?"

"Wow you really are being honest. Well, yeah, of course I am. She's my best friend and what if I lose her because I have these stupid feelings?" she feels less angry and upset now and more frustrated at herself.

"Your feelings are not stupid, little bird. They are valid. And as for losing her, I don't think that's possible, I've seen how you are with each other. That's love." Pedro turns into the village and flashes his ID to the security guard, who waves his car through. Raven doesn't believe him, she _can't_ believe him.

"Having hope is foolish."

"Having hope is brave." he says simply.

Raven tilts her head and crosses her arms. "You think so?"

"Yes. Speaking from experience as well, you need to tell her."

"Experience?" she asks, and Pedro starts walking her back to their flats. She's secretly glad he's still keeping her company and not leaving her alone to her own thoughts.

"I let someone go." he shrugs casually but Raven can tell by the tight tone of his voice that he's still somehow wounded from his past. "And I regret it every day. That's why I'm telling you to go for it. Don't leave here with regrets Raven. And who knows? Perhaps she feels the same way."

Raven barks a short laugh. "That's ridiculous, I know she doesn't. And I'm sorry by the way. About what happened to you. Is there any chance you can go back to them?" She stops outside her room, and pulls the keycard out of her pocket.

"She's married now." he whispers and she slots the card into the lock, opening the door.

"Pedro-" she starts and her heart feels too heavy at his confession.

"It's okay. Just don't let the same thing happen to you. Promise me, little bird?" he blinks rapidly and Raven nods. She now understands. She can't let what happened to Pedro happen to her. She has to tell Clarke. The question now is when is the right time? Is there ever going to be a right time? She gives him a quick hug and enters her room, throwing her jacket onto the chair in the corner and stretches out on the bed.

She wonders if Clarke is still dancing with him. If she's kissed him.

She wonders if Clarke's coming back alone tonight.

 

//

 

Raven's arm muscles are on fire but she's determined to hold on for another five seconds at least. _One. Two. Three._

Her biceps tremble and she drops the weight onto the stands and curses. Only two more fucking seconds. She's been thrown off her game ever since the club last night, and she couldn't sleep, just kept tossing and turning in her bed waiting and waiting. At about two a.m. she heard Clarke stumble down the corridor and unlock her door. Then, silence.

Raven's never been so thankful to _not_ hear Clarke in all her life.

When the sun had finally shown through the cracks in the blinds, Raven had fully woken herself up, slipped on her gym gear, and headed straight for the weights. She needs to feel the pressure, she needs to push through her pain.

She needs to speak to Clarke.

Reaching for a towel, she debates whether she'd even be awake yet. Probably not, it's still too early and Clarke is the type of person to sleep off a hangover, instead of the usual aspirin and water method that Raven prefers. That, and exercise. She fucking loves exercise. There's something about pushing her body to its limits and reaping the rewards that resonates with her. It's the feeling of sore muscles and sweaty skin at the end of a session that makes her feel like she's accomplished _something_.

Clarke hates the gym. She prefers running.

For fucks sake Raven. Can you not go ten seconds without thinking about her? She shakes her head, dabs her neck and chest with the towel and moves away the weights. She's about to go to the mats and do some push ups when the door opens and she glances up.

Speak of the devil and she shall appear.

Clarke heads straight for her, and sits down on one of the mats next to where she had dropped her towel. Raven raises an eyebrow.

"Good morning."

Clarke groans loudly (Raven tries very hard to remain calm) and flops down onto the mat, covering her eyes with her hands.

"Mom woke me up. Said I couldn't stay in bed cause we have a game tomorrow. Bitch." Clarke mumbles and Raven laughs for the first time in what seems like a lifetime.

"Hungover much?"

"Where did you go anyway? I looked over and you'd disappeared." Clarke's eyes are still covered and Raven is glad she can't see her reaction.

"Left early, I got a headache and didn't want to risk anything for the game." she kneels down on the other mat. Clarke sits up quicker than Raven would've expected and runs her eyes over her, looking concerned. "I'm okay now." Raven adds quickly.

"Okay, but next time come find me yeah? I was worried."

"Aw you care so much about me. That's cute." Raven says, half-joking but actually praying it's true.

"Of course I do dumbass."

Her pulse races. "Good."

"Right, so what are we doing? Yoga?" she says hopefully and Raven is very aware of the sudden change in subject.

"Nope, push ups."

"Fuck off, anything but that." Clarke groans again and Raven rolls her eyes.

"You know it's amazing how fit you are and how much stamina you have for a professional soccer player that hates any exercise but running laps."

"There's other things you can build up stamina with." Clarke smirks and Raven wishes she'd just kept her mouth shut, but she can't act as if Clarke had said anything wrong.

"Oh yeah?"

"I mean I would show you but it looks like you're too busy doing push ups so..." Clarke winks and Raven starts to get herself into position in order to stop Clarke from seeing her cheeks from blushing. Well shit.

"It's just as well. You'd never be able to keep up with me anyway." the words are out of Raven's mouth before she can stop them and for one mad second she thinks she's stepped over that invisible line, but Clarke just laughs and she can breathe properly again.

"How _dare_ you question my abilities in bed, Reyes. Just for that-" she launches herself at Raven who barely has anytime to react before Clarke's hands are reaching around her sides and tickling her. Raven lashes out with her feet and tries to get her balance to sit up and defend herself, but Clarke has her pinned down and tickles her harder.

"Clarke- stop please- _Clarke_!"

"Say you're sorry." her hands are relentless and Raven can't breathe.

" _I'm sorry!_ I tap out!" Raven yells, but as soon as Clarke's movements ease and she gets the slightest bit of room she grabs her arms and twists her body, flipping them over. Raven lands on top and immediately clamps her thighs next to Clarke's legs to stop her from escaping.

"Hey no fair! That's cheating." Clarke frowns playfully and Raven thinks it's the most adorable expression she's ever seen.

"How is that cheating? You let your guard down." Raven shrugs and holds Clarke's hands down to the mat with her own.

"Cheater."

"Sore loser."

She doesn't notice it originally, but now as there's a brief silence, she glances down at Clarke to see her slightly breathless, chest heaving as she recovers. Then she's distinctly aware of the fact she's on top of Clarke, holding her to the mat using her thighs. Which means Clarke is in between a very delicate place.

Clarke looks up at her through wild eyes and smirks. "I have an idea."

Raven gulps. "Yeah?"

"Do your push ups. Now."

"On top of you?"

"Extra motivation."

"Or a distraction." Raven murmurs and Clarke raises an eyebrow. She moves quickly in order to avoid Clarke's gaze and positions herself hovering over her body. _God_. This is either the stupidest or greatest thing she's ever agreed to.

Slowly and carefully, she lowers herself as she begins the push up. Clarke stares directly at her but she just concentrates on how far down she's letting her body go. She feels the connection of their bodies between them and raises her head, very pointedly ignoring Clarke's little gasp.

"One." she says, and starts to go down with a little more pace. Clarke is frozen beneath her. "Two."

"Raven..." Clarke moans and Raven's eyes dart to meet hers.

"Three."

As she moves down for the fourth one, she decides to take advantage of the situation she's in, fearing she'd never get to be this close and _sexual_ with Clarke ever again. She lets her body press closer this time, which allows her head to rest fully on Clarke's shoulder. As she starts pulling up, she drags her lips across Clarke's jaw, which elicits another moan, this time louder, from her.

"What's wrong Clarke? I thought this was your idea." she whispers and on the fifth push up she kisses her lightly on the space underneath her earlobe.

"You little shit." Clarke finally speaks and Raven grins.

"Can't handle it? Cause I can keep going for a while yet, my arms aren't tired." she presses another kiss to Clarke's cheek, moving closer towards her mouth on each push up. She's only inches away to actually connecting their lips, but feeling the overwhelming strength of Clarke's desire as well as her own, she suddenly pulls up and climbs off Clarke's body.

"Ten."

"Ten?" Clarke repeats, and it's almost as if she's coming out of a drowsy sleep.

"Ten." Raven confirms and she's amazed that she actually had the willpower to pull away. All her body and mind were screaming at her to do was to kiss her, but her heart told her that it was a bad idea, and she wasn't going to ignore that. Clarke sits up and Raven's aware they're still close. She's not out of danger just yet.

"If you wanted to do that again... I wouldn't be opposed." Clarke mumbles and Raven's pulse skyrockets.

"Clarke..." she exhales her name. This only spurs Clarke on.

"Yeah?" she whispers so Raven has to lean in closer.

"Clarke I-"

The gym door slams open and they separate from each other as if they've been electrocuted.

"Hey nerds." Octavia looks up from her phone and sees Clarke standing up from the floor, and Raven spread out on a mat stretching her arms over her head to warm up her muscles.

"Hey." Clarke greets her and then looks back down at Raven. "I'll see you later yeah?"

Raven nods and watches Clarke leave the gym, her eyes never looking away for even a second.

She's pretty sure she was about three more seconds away from collapsing into Clarke's arms, whether to kiss her or confess her feelings. Whichever came first, she's not certain. But there's one thing that she is certain of.

She feels like they're inevitable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this got longer than I expected oops


End file.
